As some of you may have seen, I previously wrote a 3-part guide on how to use dating apps. If you haven’t read them already, you should. And whether you have or haven’t, I’m announcing that I’ve compiled and expanded those posts into a step-by-step eBook which will be dropping next week!
Some people may still be on the fence about sing dating apps, so in today’s post I will discuss why dating apps are a useful tool if you are looking to either date or have some casual fun.
Note: this post is NOT sponsored by any dating apps 😛
Why they’re “Bad”
I’ve talked to dozens, maybe hundreds of guys and girls about online dating apps, mainly because I’m always interested to hear about peoples experiences and whether they like or even use them. My favorite conversations are the ones with people who refuse to use them because I like to hear their reasons, and whether I agree with them or not. Here are the top reasons, in no particular order, why people refuse to use online dating apps:
- They’re “creepy”/you can’t always be sure about the person
- They’re time consuming
- I don’t need them to meet girls/guys
- They take away from the initial spark
- Swiping is shallow (obviously referring to the swiping apps)
Now, here’s the thing. If someone has a legitimate reason for why they don’t use them, I’m completely okay with that. I’ve had some conversations with people who had legitimate reasons and I’ve replied with”ah, that makes sense.” For example, if you don’t feel safe meeting up with someone you’ve never met in person before, or you are able to pick-up girls/guys in your everyday life, then that’s completely understanding. In fact, I’ve taken breaks from using them as well.
But the reason for this post is to dispel the weak, unsupported reasons so that people can make the most out of the apps, their dating life, and ultimately their happiness.
Why They’re Good
First, dating apps aren’t creepy. The reason (some) people think they are is because many online dating apps have a very negative social stigma and are labelled “hook-up” apps. While this may in fact be true, my experiences have shown that the majority of girls I speak to are actually looking for more than a one-night stand (maybe this is different for guys and girls?). More specifically, over half are looking to actually date (this could vary by city/country).
Furthermore, these are real people we’re dealing with (not counting the bots floating around these days, but I haven’t experienced many in my area). I have met so many awesome, caring girls on dating apps that I never would have otherwise, and it wasn’t any creepier because we were introduced online. Realistically, dating apps are as “creepy” as you make them, and what you do on your phone is your own business (as long as it’s not illegal/harmful/etc.). People who refuse to give an app a try because they are creeped out by the stigma surrounding them are, in my opinion, close-minded.
Second, I’m convinced that dating apps are the most time-efficient way to set up dates. As you’ve seen in my “Ultimate Guide to Dating Apps” posts, you can turn an online match into a date in less than an hour. Another big consideration is that many of us live busy lives- school, work, family, hobbies, etc. Sometimes I don’t have time to go out or am not in the mood to approach girls on the way home from work because I’m tired, lazy, whatever. Dating apps are a stress-free way to make connections whenever you can find the time.
Third, dating apps can be used as a main or supplemental tool for meeting other people. Maybe you’re really busy or are just not good at “picking-up” or making that first move, and dating apps are able to get you in the game. The apps provide a way of meeting people that you otherwise never would have met, and are a great way to get some practice or real-life experience with women that you never would have otherwise.
Now on the flip side, what if you like going out, approaching girls/guys, and have no problems getting numbers? This was me in grad school. While I didn’t do much approaching during the day, my friends and I were going out lots and I was pretty successful meeting girls this way. However, there are still those busy weeks of homework/work or weekends where you don’t get any numbers or don’t hit it off with anyone. This is where dating apps can come in as a great supplemental tool, and how I was able to set up dates during busy weeks.
And lastly, I don’t see how matching with someone is any less of a spark or more shallow than meeting someone in real life first. While feeling a spark or not can be subjective, and I can’t fault people who just don’t feel a “spark” from dating apps, the only real difference between meeting someone at a bar/coffee shop and matching with them online is that you’ve had an in-person interaction. Besides that, you get their number and are essentially at the same stage as if you’ve matched with them online.
While I do understand the argument that meeting someone in real life first can be a big difference, I think the pros of using dating apps far outweigh the cons. After all, you have nothing to lose except maybe an hour or two of your life if the person doesn’t look anything like their profile or you don’t connect with them, but that lack of connection could happen with any other person you would normally get a number from.
To wrap things up, I think that dating apps are a great way to improve your dating and sex life whether you use them as a main source of going on dates, or supplemental to going out and picking-up on your own.
Either way, enjoy them and keep an eye out for my first ever eBook which will be dropping next week!
Feel free to comment any questions, agreements/disagreements or other topics you’d like covered, and thanks for reading!